Why is memorializing your unborn child important?

Throughout all cultures and time periods individuals have had the need for rituals or memorials commemorating life changing events. These include birth, circumcision, coming of age, marriage, job training, graduations, and death. In acknowledging these children as truly human individuals, and members of our community, it is important to dignify their memories with a memorializing event.

When her father died, my mother planted a tree in the back yard of our home to remember him by. After many years had passed, and we had long since moved, I traveled back to my old hometown and asked to stop by the old house. As we pulled into the back alley, I saw it – the biggest tree around. That little bush I remembered was now over 25 feet tall. I looked at it and remembered a grandfather that I had barely known and was happy my mother had taken the time to plant it all those years ago.

You can do the same for your own child. Ramah International highly recommends that you participate in a memorial service as part of a post-abortion outreach program. However, if you are unable to attend a program of this type, here are some elements that may be presented during your own personal memorial service which you may do in the privacy of your own family:

  • Music
  • Pro-life scriptures recited
  • Poems individuals have composed during the healing journey
  • Artwork displayed
  • Hand-crafted items presented (i.e., a memorial quilt)
  • Sacred dances performed
  • Balloon’s launched with various elements included by being tied to a string on pushed inside of the balloon (i.e., aborted baby’s name, scriptures/tokens, etc)
  • Flowers/candles for each child being memorialized with time to light them and blow them out
  • Planting of rose bushes or other trees/plants in a special location – either in the individuals yard or at a memorial site
  • Placing items in a box relating to each baby being memorialized
  • Placing a plaque at the National Memorial for the Unborn
  • Making a donation to a local CPC in honor of the aborted child
  • Have each person contribute a page for a memorial album
  • Leaving the picture of the person’s abortion wound at the altar